bla bla bla~~sienzzz...(初二)

dono wat happened tonite...suddenly in bad mood...so down...juz lik...突然间有很多杂讯进入我的脑袋...should have reasons...

actually...suddenly realise something...few years oledi...my bro T wil come to my house with other two bro..then bring me go visiting.. but tis year, even my bro T come back from kl i oso dono..and he never come to my house anymore.. is it bcos i refuse to continue our dream? i really din mean it..juz dono y..the feeling seems to be disappeared..i really felt very sorry to u guys..i'm even thinking of continue, but not bcos i wan, juz bcos i think i have to..i juz need some more time to think.. i noe i din contact my bro T for some time oledi..is bcos i don dare to..i dono wd can i say if i sms o cal him..i still remember my bro T told me b4..we'll always be bro n sis..no wonder how..but..i'm not trying to blame him..i noe it's my fault..i felt helpless..haiz...

should i continue?? seems everyone is eyeing on me..scouts from my troop.. leader from other troop..frends from my sch..even in different class with me..n even my scout fren from perak.. nw dn i noe..i join scout not bcos of 'him'..but he gaves me spirit to continue on our journey towards our dream..but now, he's not tat special to me..cos i don tin i still...him.. so..seems..i lose almost half of my spirit..n the other half lose too..haiz...

tis should only be a part of the reason y i suddenly in bad mood tonite.. the other reasons..haha..i dono...mayb i'm listening to soft n sad songs..haha... anyway,writting out makes me feel better..haha..

i'm free~~

hmm.. first time i write my thoughts in blog.. hahax...

i saw him(js) yesterday when i went the spring.. he kacau me b4 i saw him..
everything seems to be normal.. i can talk normally, with him n his sis.. look at him normally.. n treat him as a simple friend.. everything will become a part of my memories.. all those unbelievable things happened in the past.. i think, for him, all those things is juz very tiny things, like never happens..haha.. the feeling of recall back is quite nice lo.. everything bitter last time juz lik..become a special experience.. experience tat made me more mature a bit..haha..

at least i'm happy now.. i'm free!! haha... hope i din get myself wrongly... but i think i wont...